We are starting a new tradition on the Freedom Personal Development Blog -Top 10 Tips Tuesdays!  Every Tuesday we will give you the Top 10 Tips to become more effective in a particular area of your personal or professional life.

Today the tips have to do with effective communication.  More specifically, how to become a better listener. 

Why should I improve my listening skills?

It’s a great question. For the simple reason that a person’s listening skills are a central component to most of the activities people care about. Your ability to understand what others are trying to tell you, to grasp details about projects, to learn information about a customer’s needs, or to understand what is going on in your family’s life all depend on your ability to effectively listen.

Active, empathetic listening plays a crucial role in good communication. By tuning into others, we avert misunderstandings and mistakes and we strengthen our business and personal relationships. Yet most of us really don’t listen effectively.

We’re taught how to read, write and speak, but rarely how to listen. The good news is that listening skills can be learned, practiced and mastered. Here are ten tips to improve your listening skills.

1. Start observing your own and other people’s listening habits – Ask yourself what it feels like when someone really listens to you and, conversely, when they don’t.

2. Stop talking! – You can’t talk and listen effectively at the same time. Spend only 20 percent of the time talking and 80 percent listening.

3. Be present and patient with the speaker – Don’t interrupt. Avoid mentally preparing your response or rebuttal while the other person is speaking.

4. Listen with empathy – Put yourself in the other person’s place so that you can understand the speaker’s point of view.

5. Let the speaker know you’re really listening – Maintain good eye contact and nod or shake your head occasionally. Your body language gives the speaker clues about whether or not you want to hear what they’re saying.

6. Identify your red flag words and hot button topics – Being aware of them will help you avoid distorting the speaker’s message or shutting down. When you close your mind, you take the risk of missing something important.

7. Eliminate external distractions – Avoid noisy restaurants or sites that are too hot, cold, windy, or uncomfortable. Move to another location in your office or at a reception if you’re having trouble hearing.

8. Keep background noise to a minimum when trying to listen to someone on the telephone – Turning magazine pages, shuffling papers, or clicking computer keys sends a signal that you’re only half-listening.

9. Practice listening by paying close attention to speakers on television – Listen to those who are giving speeches rather than just sound bites.

10. Create a checklist of listening habits you want to change – Develop an action plan for changing specific habits each week. Practicing good listening habits will help you become a master listener.

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This Top 10 List was found at http://topten.org/public/BN/BN129.html

This piece was originally submitted by Dee Helfgott, M.P.A., Author of LISTEN UP! and NETWORK SMART! booklets, Business coach, speaker, corporate trainer & author, who can be reached at CoachDHA@AOL.com. Dee Helfgott, M.P.A. wants you to know: I help clients develop and use three key success skills: Listening, Networking and Coaching. The original source is: LISTEN UP!